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The Japanese are weird

One of the reasons we're having such a tough time in Iraq is that we just aren't selling it right. If there's one thing we can learn from history, it's that after American forces defeat your nation, dismantle your army and parade you around like a bitch on the international stage, you're pretty much free to explore whatever kinks and perversions you may have. Take German sheisse videos or Japanese men getting their ear wax cleaned out by Geishas as just two examples.

So it's about time we try the same thing in Iraq. All they need to do is get that Muslim stick out of their butts...unless that's their kink, in which case, this war is already a smashing success!

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If you've gotten this far, congratulations. You can read more by going to the archives. Or you can just imagine what else might be here without clicking anything. Might I recommend a fine bottle of bourbon to accompany your fantasies? I thought so.